The Kids Score A Win

Self-portrait, 2007 (click for larger version)

"You have suffered enough,

And warred with yourself,

It's time that you won."

-From "Falling Slowly," by The Frames

I've been thinking about the picture above for a long time. I took it last spring. While the date 1.20.09 has been something to look forward to for about, oh, seven years, I was drawn to the framed statement in the window: "Damn, you're a good father." The reflection of my shaved head is visible above that.

I heard from my attorney today. The custody evaluator for my case is recommending against Troy and Delaney being uprooted to L.A. While Anne is recommended for custody because of her "primary caregiver" status, at least common sense appears to be finally gaining some merit in this case. While I'll never sway from my opinion that kids deserve equal access to both parents (except where one parent is unfit), and while I find it more than a little unfortunate that my reward for working so hard so Anne can stay home is to lose custody, it's comforting to know that somewhere in this screwed-up system is a voice of reason. I would not be intimidated, I would not be cowed, and I would not be marginalized. I've held up in this situation for over 13 months now, and I've done it for the right reason.

There is hope. And I've got a lot more left in the tank.

Blessed is the man who finds wisdom,

the man who gains understanding,

for she is more profitable than silver

and yields better returns than gold.

-Proverbs 3:13-14

More Friedlander

There will be an exhibition of Lee Friedlander’s interpretations of the landscape designs of Frederick Law Olmsted at the Met in New York for the next few months. I’ve known about this for several weeks, and would love to make it over there to see some of his prints in person for the first time.

Then yesterday I learned that his huge retrospective show, Friedlander, will be opening soon at the San Francisco Museum of Modern Art. I have had the accompanying book since it was published in 2005, and I have got to see this show. It has been in Europe for a couple of years now, and I understand that there are over 400 prints to be displayed at the San Francisco installation.

And if this all weren’t enough, the Fraenkel gallery, located a mere quarter-mile from SFMoMA, will have a show of Friedlander pictures taken from the insides of cars throughout America hanging through April.

Hmm. I checked briefly, and it looks like I could fly to Oakland for under $100. I could rent a car and go to the two shows in San Francisco. Then I could fly to Long Island for less than $200, rent a car and go the Met’s show. Then I could fly home from there.

It is so tempting. If only the rest of my life weren’t so whacked right now, I could easily see myself doing this and it would be so educational and fun. Damn.